I have been stressed and overwhelmed a lot lately. Or I made myself stress and overwhelmed. Actually, I haven’t been able to fully recuperate from all the tiring work of the past weeks.
The start of May was very big for me. Actually, the middle of April…
I could not believe that we have been doing this for 75 days already. By this, I meant that we are trying to build a relationship.
I was so happy the day you said that you’re open to the possibility of us building a relationship. There were times…
We have achieved a new first. A sleepover.
Supposedly, it was a The Voice marathon sleepover because I’m already on leave for May 9. I was excited for this but there was a change in the plan because he wanted to play and I also wanted to play. So, he’d be…
Been checking my horoscope faithfully to check if that is really what my life’s been like. It has been helpful a couple of times when I needed to say something or get something out of my system.
Maybe, I just needed the boost.
Last Wednesday, I talked to my friend about my situation with a certain someone. He suggested that make use of some superstitious stuff like looking for a sign.
So, I thought of something that could be really improbable to happen but not in the least way impossible.
The sign is that if I see a graduate of UP BS IE around the Ortigas area on Thursday / Friday then there may be a chance that we’d get together. I chose that sign because I know only a handful of people who work around the Ortigas area. That’s my initial thought, a personal meeting. But, it didn’t turn out that way.
Thursday came and we had our team lunch out for our February birthday celebrants. After the lunch, our ‘car’ decided to go to the nearby Moonleaf Ortigas in Ortigas Home Depot for our tea fix. I ordered a yakult drink because I’m trying to stay away from caffeine.
There was a promo and we were able to get a free milk tea and a Moonleaf planner.
When we got to the office, I asked my office mate for the Moonleaf planner because I want to check it out. Then, there it was, a full-sized picture of a college batch mate on the page of the Moonleaf planner.
Was it this? I wasn’t so specific that I needed to see them personally. I thought about it. Would I accept this sign? Or should I check whether there will be another one?
I got off work early on Friday because I need to go to class at around 6PM.
On my way to Trinoma (because I had to claim the book I reserved), I dropped by MegaMall because that the nearest to the MRT Station. Lo and behold, as I was about to exit the mall, I see another UP IE alumnus.
It’s confirmed then. Another manifestation of the sign - twice at that. The chances of us getting together is two times more than it was before.
I’d take it as it is. It may bring about invalid expectations but I know that right now. It gave momentary happiness but I guess that to get what I want, I’d have to work hard for it too.
I have this recurring problem. I just can’t seem to escape you – like a person jumping from a cliff towards the water, like Newton’s apple. You get the point?
We know this thing called moving on, I have been doing that for the past couple of weeks. Actually, since the year started. But, you keep clawing your way back into my life or I am letting you do that to me.
For quite a long time now, I have been doing well with not texting you or talking to you. Then, I see you again and everything crumbles and stumbles and tears apart. My world returns to chaos. My beating heart suddenly wanted to win a marathon. An ECG apparatus would have gone haywire.
Tell me, why do you do that to me? Or why am I letting you do that to me?
I cannot seem to shake you off. I go all calm and collected then one day I go crazy again. Just like today. I was so proud of how I went on about three weeks of not talking to you. Then, when it was about lunch time, you sent me a message using your brother’s mobile.
Jod, it’s RM. I need someone to talk to.
I said that I will be a friend and I gave my side of the bargain. I talked to you. And we did talk a lot – all through lunch and my afternoon break time. Then, I came to thinking, should I make sense of anything? But you said really nice words to me, like there has never been a drift. Well, the drift is totally my fault and my assumption. I wanted to drift away into the sea and so far from you. But, we go back to my first dilemma, I cannot escape from you.
I just can’t.
You know why I’m so excited about this Bora trip? Kasi kaming apat na magkakapatid lang ang magkakasama (+ yung asawa ni ate). So, parang bonding lang talaga namin.
Fun yun kasi lumaki ako na hindi ko sila nakasama so parang hindi naman kami talaga close. Tapos sila, magkakalapit lang yung age so nagkakasundo talaga sila. Lagi akong OP, lagi akong napagti-tripan.
Kaya, ito na ang isa sa major chance na maging close talaga kaming apat.